Frankos voskrese

In part two of the series, My Great-Uncle Is a Ghost, we now have a plan for putting Frank to eternal rest. My mom called me this weekend to say that she met someone who can help us. While filling in for another nurse for a few hours, my mom met Dr. Roger Pile, a self-proclaimed "ghost psychologist" who lives in Charlottesville. Dr. Pile told my mom that, normally, ghosts who haunt are of people who died tragically or violently, but sometimes, he said, very stubborn people just won't go to the other side. His advice? All it takes to exorcise a ghost is apparently to confront it, talk to it, and tell it to "walk towards the light." Just repeat "Go towards the light" over and over, and eventually the ghost will get so annoyed with you that it will go away. Or something.

So the plan is to head to my grandma's place in New Jersey for (as we like to call it in my family) "American" Easter at the end of March. Then, bust in on the poor couple whom Uncle Frank is haunting and see if we can convince him to make like a moth. This is going to be awesome. Anyone up for accompanying me on this road trip? :)

*Footnote explaining the title of the post: I was telling Laura this story, including the bit about how we're going to try to raise Frank over Easter, and said, "Too bad it's not over Russian Easter. Then I could say, 'Frankos voskrese!'" See, because on Easter in the Orthodox tradition, we say in Russian "Christ has risen" or "Christos voskrese." Get it? I guess unless you were Russian Orthodox and had an undead great uncle, it's not very funny after all.


Chris Cameron said…
Isn't it his business about where he wants to go? Seems like you'd be pissed if someone came along and told you to die or move or something. If I were a ghost and you decided to make me leave and I didn't want to, I'd kick you square in the nuts.
Anonymous said…
Where in NJ? I'd be up for going but I won't be around the last two weekends in March. Try April :)

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