I have Google news set to give me stories about a variety of things, from human remains to classical archaeology. One of the words it searches for is forensics. Today, I got this story that mentioned the word from ABC Sport in Australia. Try as I might, even after 2 complete read-throughs, I have absolutely no idea what this story is about. Read the story and test your English reading comprehension below!
Oliver claims first Golden Slipper with Forensics
And now for a test of your reading comprehension:
1) What kind of race is this?
d. all of the above
2) If Forensics is $13.70 and Zizou is $9.40, how much do they total?
c. 200 lbs
d. none of the above
3) What is a synonym for "plum sit one back"?
4) Doesn't Miss Finland have anything better to do in her own country?
a. Miss Finland is a contestant, you moron. A beauty queen can't be 3 years old.
b. Sure she can. Remember Jon-Benet Ramsey?
c. Be that as it may, Miss Finland is still an animal.
d. Damn straight, she's a root rat. My donger's still sore from having a naughty with her.
1) d. Toddler-dog-horse racing, or Digeridoo, is an old Maori sport whose tradition is carried out to this day in Australia.
2) d. Although a. is an obvious choice, since $23.10 Australian when converted into real money is about 50 cents, the correct answer is d. Forensics and Zizou can both be sold to the Elmer's glue factory, netting a tidy sum of $500 each or $1,000 total.
3) d. Damien Oliver, riding Forensics, obviously sat sideways, leaving one "plum" sitting back on the horse. The closest Australian slang term is donger, a synonym for penis.
4) d. Duh.
How did you do? :)